“So, the war in Iraq is officially over? Didn’t that happen like 3 years ago?” No, that was just Cameron and Justin ending things.
“Okay, I honestly just noticed that keyboards aren’t in alphabetical order.” This is a quote from you and my two year old cousin.
“At first his road rage was totally hot, but now it’s getting Chris Brown scary.” Yet somehow I always feel like I’m your Rihanna.
“[singing] When the moon hit’s your eye, like a big pizza pie, that’s VAGINA. DaDaDaDaDaaa.” Did you guys bake pot brownies again?
“Tiger’s ex so won, she’s rich as hell AND doesn’t have to watch golf anymore.” That was actually a stipulation in the prenup.