Charlie covering his ears
Two annoying girls moved into the apartment above me.
I'm forced to hear every dumb thing they say.
These are my letters to them.


“Let’s never move out of Gaysville, they’re so clean and nice!” Is there a Batman signal for unsanitary & unruly gay dudes?

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  1. Hope says:

    You are an amazing man.

  2. Gesika says:

    I’ve had this same issue. You know too much when you know what virtual strangers sound like during sex. I stayed becuse my appartment was just too cute to part with. If I had to listen to the inane discussions from upstairs at least I had a pretty wall to bang my head against.

  3. Justine says:

    You should leave a note on their door with this website address. Maybe they’d get the hint. (only when pigs develop nuclear power)
    If the lanlord won’t do something I’d suggest investing in some comfy earplugs. It sounds like you’ll be needing them for a while…
    Good luck with keeping your sanity

  4. Liz says:

    This will hopefully attract some, but let’s hope they’re at least somwhat intelligent. Otherwise it will just be gasoline on the fire!

  5. Elizabeth says:

    I just read the archives and bookmarked the site, thanks for the entertainment. I pray you keep your sanity through it all.

  6. Lulu says:

    I discovered your site yesterday and have read all of your letters. You are brilliant and witty, I hope that comforts you when you’re dreaming of stampedes!
    Thanks for sharing :)

  7. Nikki Heat says:

    You make my day a little brighter. I applaud you.

  8. BJ says:

    I want to suggest that you start editing these comments.
    “Amazing”,”Brilliant”, “Witty”
    They read like box for a B comedy film.
    Comments should only be allowed that are some form of one-upsmanship of your comments.

    For example:

    “I still don’t understand therapy, do I tell her EVERYONE I have sex with?” No, just the unprotected ones…yes everyone.

    ….Actually it’s only supposed to be family members and unprotected ones.

    okay wait that wasn’t really one-upsmanship

    Dam this is hard

    forget it…”Amazing”,”Brilliant”, “Witty”

    They likely hate themselves enough it will probably get you laid with them.

    and then it will just be your little puppy all alone listening to you guys

  9. lol says:

    i bet your penis is huge

  10. Charlie McDowell says:


  11. Orual says:

    You have an intellectual wit that amuses me. Your living situation is deplorable but I must say that these girls are more intelligent than that guy I used to live a across from that talked to his cat all day, make that yelled at his cat all day.

  12. M says:

    You, Sir, are my new hero.

  13. Lauren says:

    Is it possible for people to ACTUALLY be that stupid? haha, wow.



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