Two annoying girls moved into the apartment above me.
I'm forced to hear every dumb thing they say.
These are my letters to them.
I'm forced to hear every dumb thing they say.
These are my letters to them.
28
(regarding her loud fart) “Exactly why I’ll never move in with a guy. Who wants to give THAT up?” I guess I’m the lucky one then.
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I do not understand these girls, so much for shallow tarts, it would appear they have an inner pig to them. Lovely
HEY EVERYONE,
I WAS VOTED TIME’S 140 BEST TWITTER FEEDS. IF YOU HAVE A MOMENT, PLEASE VOTE FOR MY RANKING SO THAT MY MOM WILL START RETURNING MY PHONE CALLS.
http://www.time.com/time/specials/packages/article/0,28804,2058946_2058990_2058979,00.html
!
Done.
done! and are you alienated or something?
voted for you!
yay!
So apparently I am a robot because I couldn’t read the little code word thing you have to rewrite when you submit a vote. But I did eventually get to vote for you.
http://aisforrandom.blogspot.com/2011/02/im-not-computer.html
You are not the only one with that issue
You’re #4 on the poll right now!! wooo! :D
What’s with the ten people voting you down?
Thanks!!!
There are 18 people now. why?!?!?!
Only if you tell us what made your mom cut you and your sis off from laundry privileges when you were kids…
Nah, while I do want you to tell us a story, I already voted for you!
Charlie, you don’t need to yell at us. Of course we’ll all go vote for you! I did!
I believe your capslock is broken, Charlie. But I will vote for you.
Done!
It’d be great if you won!
I must be being stupid… but I can’t work out how to vote for you…?
You’re one vote closer to your mom calling you back.
And congrats
I’m also directly below Sarah Palin…HELP.
Looks like you just beat her and also Lady Gaga, nicely done!
I’ll vote for you Charlie, but I’m not so sure you’ll make it. After all, Sarah Palin can see Russia from her house- there’s not many people who can beat that.
You’re number 4 at the moment, which means you are in front of Lord Voldermort and drunk hulk. Oh and Sarah Palin and Lady Gaga. You’re doing well!
I am suprised that she got any votes at all
Amazing! Congratulations.
These girls are just so classy…
What? My hubby and I let ’em rip all the time around each other. :) I also belch way better than him.
Haha,I love this ’cause it makes married life sound fun to me now.
My hubby likes it when one comes out of me. He actually giggles. Fortunately for me, mine rarely smell, unlike his….
do u liek me?
rite yes/no
No.
Dire consequences; To say ‘yes’ would be to acknowledge your being as a separate entity from which is my conscience stream. To adhere to such beliefs would be blasphemy, as I know in actuality that life as “we” know it, is nothing more than myself fabricating this farce to answer the age-old question: “What would you do for a Klondike Bar?” As you’re nothing more than a mere figment of my imagination I have no choice but to refuse, as admitting admiration for you would be the same as having a fondness for myself; I’m not vain, nor arrogant.
If I were to entertain the notion that all said in the aforementioned paragraph were some sort of travesty, then maybe I’d be tempted to accede; be it as it may, No.
Apologies, Sassy.
o_o
I think I like her more.
Wrong! The age-old question is:
How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop?
Very distinguished choice of words. I enjoy reading this area of discussion even more now.
I agree with Sasquatch. 0_0
Well said :).
Yes! :)
I read somewhere that Emperor Claudius passed a law legalizing flatulence at banquets out of concern for people’s health. Also, often times if people try too hard and spend all day holding it in as soon as they relax and doze off to sleep it comes out. So it’s probably a good idea to let it out, especially since your husband might hear it while you’re sleeping anyway.
Claudius was a corrupt emperor, who sexually abused slaves and had a strange childhood with a murderess, bi-polar mother.
But he wanted to make sure no one contracted an intestinal disease from holding their flatulence in, sounds like a pretty stand up guy…
There is also a strong possibility he was schizophrenic.
You, sir, are a major buzzkill.
I do try.
You succeed.
I really don’t believe Defender is attempting to do so, just proving two sides to the posts. So that maybe, we can find a tiny sliver of hope for these girls.
“GAM Defender’s Defender” eh? I think I’m in love~
This AMAZING moment perfectly compliments the picture of you covering your ears! lol
She doesn’t have to give it up! She just needs to wait until the guy is asleep and then let it all out!!
You’re now at number 4 Charlie!
As long as they were not playing “pull my finger” with each other, I approve.
I live in a house of all girls (my mom, and two sisters) and a gay guy (my brother)… I have to agree with her.
wait, do you like these chicks, or hate them…
Who else has been wondering this?
me
Ew. Girls don’t fart.
You obviously aren’t a girl, and therefore don’t know the truth.
failure.
I MEANT:
You obviously aren’t a girl if don’t know the truth.
Yes, we do.
…You’re joking, right? Riiiiight?
You must be a female android and no has told you yet. ._.
I hate when girls act like they don’t fart or burp, we’re human obviously, and we all do, whether you admit it or not, so correction : girls may not fart or burp IN PUBLIC, but we deff do in private. if you dont, then, you’re abnormal and you may want to see a doctor. :) have a good day !
That’s only if you move in with the wrong guy — the right guy will have farting contests with you…
Ok, you see, if they ever felt comfortable around a guy or actually, more specifically, once they are AMAZINGLY committed to a guy and they are good with one another then she will be able to fart in front of an other guy.
AHHHH CHARLIE I LOVE YOU u make my dayss lol everytime i read your letters i can’t help but smile you are soooo awesome and i’ve check every day for a new post plleasee don’t ever stop!!!
Wow, well thank you!
When you find a good man you don’t give it up! He laughs and farts back :)
There is a simple way to fix this, Charlie. If she farts, you fart even louder!
I love you.
I’ve tried that. She’s always louder.
Hahahahaha! That made my day.
You should buy noise cancelling earphones
NOOOO!!!!!!! If he did that then we wouldn’t get these magnificent letters!
Hey Charlie! I got to an all girls high school so I understand the annoying nonsense that girls spit out of their mouths. I think this is hilarious and true, so please do not stop writing!
Riddle me this: Popping a guy’s back zits is okay, but farting in front of a guy isn’t? I’m so confused.
This… is a very good point.
I agree with this one. I would imagine that those two would be in the same category of “eewww”-ness…
its my birthday :D
Happy birthday!
happy birthday!
im just waiting for the day they get smart and find this. lmao
I bet you’ll be waiting a REALLY long time for that to happen.
I’m not. Then the blog would end.
Uh… how would stumbling across this site make them smart?
Will everyone please vote for Charlie so he can pass Sarah Palin? PLEASE. How is she ranked above you?!?!
she’s got mostly no votes though, and charlie’s are mostly yes votes.
that was actually replying to a comment about sarah palin being above charlie on the time poll. no idea why it appeared on its own.
Allow me to be offtopic for a moment. I enjoy reading the Defender’s comments.
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHA
GREAT post for my birthday :)
Enjoy your birthday!
thanks charlie, i definitely did :)
jesus, youre like a celebrity. only a matter of time before the girls above you find this. god help us all.
jesus, youre like a celebrity. only a matter of time before the girls above you find this. god help us all ..
I missed you guys :(
do the GAM have twitter? because you might be in trouble…
“CATHY! COME HERE!”
“what?”
“So i was voting on the twitter top 140, and i noticed something strange…”
“Really?”
“Yeah…The beibs isn’t on the list!”
haha false alarm.
Farting in front of a guy…sounds like what my brother and I do everytime I visit him. Oh and Charlie, congrats on being nominated!
Thanks :)
And now, a limerick to express my feelings about this post:
Once one of the girls let out some loud gas,
And pronounced at the sound that came from her ass:
She would never move in with a guy,
She doesn’t want to have to be sly.
If I was a guy I would pass.
*applause*
I guess it’s a good thing that I took the time to look at the comments on this… YOU HAVE MY VOTE, CHARLIE.
Charlie you should shout “I’ve heard that” everytime she farts loudly! Cx
Should I be concerned that my boyfriend is more embarrased about farting around me then I am around him? I’m not a pig about it or anything, its just part of the bodily functions to me.
One day, they may find someone worth holding it in for, their words, not so much their body functions.
Do you think these two girls will ever find this page?